The Queen Returns

Cheers! I’m back and with a sheepish grin, I admit to this being my first post of 2020. With blogging being shifted to social media captions and stories, I had just gotten into the flow, using these new platforms for sharing my thoughts. And while I love the daily interaction with my facebook and instagram communities, I wanted to write at length this time about-

The Comeback Journey

Living a life that most of us expect to be a garden of roses, there’s time and again a roller coaster waiting out there. And if natural hindrances like the ongoing pandemic, cyclones, locust attacks, and economic slowdown weren’t enough, humanity is still compromised at all levels.

Facing a solid blow in the face (not a physical one always) or a stab on the back is unfortunately a part of life. Colleagues, competitors, and even the least expected friends and relatives can sometimes turn out to be the biggest foes, putting you on the regression track. Sounds relatable? I’m sure- for none of us are spared from deliberate external attacks that play havoc with our work- and more importantly- our mind! And it is thus a challenge- to step out from the mess that people and situations create to rise up and make a comeback like a Queen (or a King- I don’t mean to do any gender bias here).

The Setback

A peer challenging your abilities- an opportunist sabotaging your growth- the society questioning your marital status- endless situations- and endless woes! Getting angry, sad, anxious or depressed in such cases is totally understandable. The recent death of a celebrity has also brought out such issues rooted in the glitterati world. But well, I won’t be discussing that at all in this post; leaving it aside with my sincere prayers for the soul that has left to meet the divine.

Coming again to the setback moment- one question I suggest that you ask yourself- how long do you tend to stay in the set back phase? And what do you do while you succumb to the darkness that is thrown at you- maybe unknowingly but in most cases, deliberately!

I would like to narrate a very small example from my school days. I was a couch potato- extremely plump and often teased for being fat. I argued and fought- breaking friendships- preferring to stay alone- and that setback continued for years! It was only years later that I took action by joining a gym and changing my diet- and there- began the journey of a comeback- slow- but steady.

Having made fitness a lifestyle, today when I look back I realize that my comeback journey began quite late- I could have achieved this level of fitness more than a decade ago- instead of cribbing and crying (yes as a kid I did that) I could have responded in a constructive way.

The Comeback

Learning from my childhood self- and from other experiences- I have come to live by the first rule of having a successful comeback journey- and that is- BEGIN NOW.

There’s no ‘auspicious timing’ that one must wait for- to begin rising up. Success is always waiting out there- and the only two combined bridges that can lead you there are- consistent hard work and positive thinking.

Having learned the lesson of acting fast several times, my setback moments these days have thankfully shrunk down to few minutes or hours or maximum one day. The moment someone tries to push me back, instead of wasting my time on the silliness of ‘why are they doing that’ ‘I can’t face it’ – I put all my focus and energy into finding the best way out- and so far – with all gratitude to the Universe- I would say that I’ve made it out of the mess with minimum or no damage.

It was on one of my previous jobs that a colleague suddenly started criticizing my work, putting the statement down everyone’s throat that I wasn’t capable of writing good content. Office politics is pervasive and one of the easiest ways to step above such sinking sand is to anchor yourself with excellence. I spent around 3 to 4 days analyzing my work, looking out for every detail that could be improved upon, reading- researching- and writing with a more positive mindset. The result- loads from appreciation from the team- and well, a promotion that followed soon.

Let Go…

Being constantly bullied, criticized, insulted, ignored- can lead to a lot of bitterness accumulating in one’s mind and that unfailingly reflects in not just lowered work efficiency but also deteriorating personal life situations. And letting go all such negativity becomes difficult when the source is unexpected. This often happens when friends backstab, supporters back-off and well, while going through the trauma of failed relationships.

Letting go is all about accepting your current situation and releasing all the negativity that is holding you back from a brighter life. Blaming your partner for all the wrong that happened or vice versa- going down the guilt abyss for not being able to keep your relationship going is a nightmare for one’s soul.

When you want to let go- firstly cut off from the whirlwind of questions that are clogging your mind- why- how- now what- if this, then what- nothing. Letting go is the ideology of living in the present and rejoicing all you have with utmost gratitude. It is only then that you can neutralize yourself for a better tomorrow. And with those baby steps of becoming a stronger person, you eventually grow into an all-new-being- the Comeback King/Queen!

Hold On…

‘I will show them properly’- I’d salute the person who has never thought, said, or acted on this statement- isn’t it a Universal thing? And in the process, most of us tend to change ourselves. For new hairstyles- wardrobe makeovers- common activities that people engage in especially during breakups and societal bashing, I would suggest you go through the process without degrading your present self. And in any case, one shouldn’t punish their happy and innocent side and replacing their dreams and beautiful childlike qualities with a revengeful attitude.

So while you make any changes to yourself or to your work or your values- always make sure you don’t lose true self in the process. For only when you hold on to your essence, that you can step up to conquer the world!

Take it Ahead!

A successful comeback can take years- months-weeks-days- or it can be an overnight game. The mantra is to keep going with a positive attitude while keeping your real self guarded at all times. 

We all deserve to be the best versions of ourselves- so go ahead be the Queen that you’re meant to be!

This was a pretty long post and if you’ve made it so far, I really appreciate that.
Thank you!

Any suggestions, feedback, discussions are welcome. Have a great day!

Love,

Bhavs